


Bookworms and Boys Only Bathrooms (pt 1)

by AttnReader



Series: Bookworms and Boys Only Bathrooms [1]
Category: My Chemical Romance, frerard - Fandom
Genre: 2014, Frerard, M/M, Smut, present day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-26
Updated: 2014-11-26
Packaged: 2018-02-27 02:07:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2674877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AttnReader/pseuds/AttnReader
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's 2014 My Chemical Romance is no more and the boys have moved on, they've tried to move on.. for Gerard  it's been a fictitious existence... He's been loving the life he's created, the life he's left it all to acquire, but the mental strain and exhaustion are starting to wear him down and his mentality has been shaken now the past is coming down hard. He's not sleeping, He's not the least bit happy, He's being suffocated and he's about to make a decision. Gerard is headed to London to meet up with Frank, the one and only lover that Gerard just can't forget.....</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bookworms and Boys Only Bathrooms (pt 1)

**Author's Note:**

> I'm more of an artist than a writer that being said the punctuation may be off and there more than likely will be mistakes. This was supposed to be a one shot but I'm deciding to add another part.. it's just where the story took me. I hope you like what I've done so far!

It's always hardest on nights like this, nights when she's pulling all the covers to her side of the bed. The air is thick because she insists on having the heater turned up to max level. The season has began to change the stale heat of summer is fading and the crisp fresh air of fall has arrived. Yet I'm here, In this bed suffocating in more ways than one. The past lingers in my mind most nights making it harder and harder to get to sleep. Frank's voice haunts my dreams, his touch still etched into my soul. I never anticipated how hard it would be to forget him, how much regret I would carry within me. I never really thought... fuck it, time to make my way out of bed. Careful not to wake her, I grab my pillow and head down the hall to my office... turning that God damn heater off on the way. In my office I'm free, I can lock the door and lock the world out. I can think about whoever I want to think about and not have to feel an ounce of guilt for doing so. I've worked so hard to create something 100% mine, something I could be proud of. I've been the father I am supposed to be. I check into AA every week and I tell my therapist all of the things she's trying hard to make me forget.. I don't like that she is erasing him from me. She's killing Frank off in the form of 20 mg tablets. Confusion and obsessive impulse will always be lurking in the back of my mind. I'll sit with this just as I do every night until sleep eventually finds me, and it does. 

The early morning light flickers through the windows,I love being up before the sun rises. I head to the kitchen grab my coffee the house is quiet and still, eerily comforting. I hear footsteps coming down the hall and she greets me with a halfhearted look. They say when two people occupy a space together for so long they start to take on each other's thoughts and despair. She's eyeing me and waiting for what she already knows is coming. I get another cup out and pour her coffee... my voice cracks as I start to explain. They managed to get me an early flight out to London, they've moved some press around and added a few radio interviews, I'll be leaving tonight. She presses her hand to her face and gives me a concerned look. She understands but I doubt she's happy about it. I gather up my papers and my tablet and head back to my office to pack leaving my coffee steaming on the counter. That's in essence what I am, always leaving bits and pieces of myself behind but never truly there. I pack up my tour clothes, my pajamas and the few other articles of clothing I've grown accustomed to, Kiss my daughter and my wife goodbye and head out to meet my ride. Arriving at LAX I manage to navigate myself through the slew of people and get to my loading area. I dig around my pocket feeling for the little blue pill that will put me out for the next few hours, chase it with my now cold latte, gather my book bag and board my flight. I'll be waking up in a different timezone soon enough with a much different plan.

When I arrive in London it appears to be early morning and I am really fucking out of it, the combination of jet lag and Xanax is some crazy shit. I meet a few fans, dish out some hugs and I'm off to my room. I should be going to bed but I won't, not today. It would be pretty naive to think that I don't keep tabs on Frank, that I don't check his tour dates, that I wouldn't know that he'll be preforming just a few blocks from here later tonight. I can't shake him, I can't get the taste of him off my tongue and it's been well over four years now. I'm so fucking done pretending to be someone I'm not. However there's still the fact that I have to approach him and hope he doesn't knock me the fuck out for fucking him over the way I did. I'm starting to get that intense feeling, that rush of adrenaline that high that only Frank and preforming can give me. He doesn't know I'll be at the show and I doubt he even knows I'll be preforming in a couple of days myself. I wouldn't want him to know, I don't expect him to ever see my solo set. I lay back on the bed reach for the fresh pack of smokes in my jeans and take one out. tonight I just want to be immersed in everything that reminds me of Frank. 

okay, I must admit I'm nervous as fuck and questioning why I'm even here... why did I come? why can't I just leave Frank alone. Then all of sudden there he is.. onstage .. thrashing around screaming full of anger and angst fuck is he hot when he's angry. I'm sitting here with this massive hard on and this schoolboy crush. Most lyrics are sad and painful and even more painful when I realize 90% of them are about me, about us. I don't have a plan, I came so unprepared for this.. I sit on the balcony for a long while. Sitting and contemplating even after Frank's set is over. I watch him, study him.. intrigued by him. Lost in a trance and when I finally manage to pull myself out of it I've noticed all the equipment has been moved and another band is setting up. FUCK! how am I going to find him now!??? not to mention I feel sick as fuck. Playing in front of thousands of people is no match at all for how nervous I am right now. I decide to head for the boys room, after I make it through the hostile crowd I find solace in a empty stall. I sit trying to regain some composure.. a lot of thoughts start to run through my mind, and then it hits me.. what if that was it? what If I lost my chance entirely. As I'm lost in thought I start to trace all the stall art people have left over time notes, phrases, artwork.... angry people looking for vengeance by not so tactfully scribbling an ex lovers name and number in bold black sharpie or hearts with initials.. every piece telling it's own story. I'm so lost in thought, that I'm startled when someone nearly kicks in the door to the stall next to mine. someone angry.. someone livid .. by the sound of it I can tell this person is drunk. the stall door locks and all goes silent. A few minutes go by and there's this uneasy silence.. I peak through the crack in my stall and my body goes in to shock as I see the all familiar knuckles, the lettering I've traced a thousand times with my own hands, The Bookworm ink so bold, it's all i can focus on. A voice breaks the silence and it is not mine.. " why the fuck didn't he come.. " there's an unbearable sadness in Frank's voice.. That's when my subconscious takes over and I whisper, "maybe he did" .. there it's out I said it and now he knows I'm here. There's this long awkward pause .. we shuffle around and eventually both make it to our feet. As the doors unlatch in one synchronized motion I think to myself this is it. This is what it all comes down to.. as I make my way out of the stall, staring at my feet ... i take a deep breath in and look up. 

Frank is staring back at me, and now I can't help but look deep into those eyes, eyes that I once knew so well. Frank is still Frank but not the Frank I knew. This alone makes feel a rising wave of guilt in the pit of my stomach. 

"Frank I-" 

Frank lunges forward, his fist headed straight for my face.. I close my eyes I deserve it I know I do.. His fist powers past me landing on our reflections and shattering them to the ground...

my eyes closed I'm willing to let Frank do his worst.. I can feel him coming toward me, breathing heavily .. anger radiating off of him. I'm not scared, I've longed for his touch for four long years I don't care if the price I have to pay is rage. He grabs my jacket and pushes me into the bathroom stall.. I lose my footing , as I feel myself going down.. something snaps and within seconds I'm the one pushing Frank up against the wall. I stare deep into his eyes.. and then it happens.

Frank's lips are pressed against mine, hot heavy his hands in my hair and mine in his.. frustration, anger, rough but not to rough.. soft but not to soft. Every inch of me is stiff with excitement and from what I can feel Frank's is too. I let up off of Frank our lips still locked he grabs my jacket and tugs on it until I get the hint and remove it. Everything is happening so fast and I'm so ready.. willing to take anything he wants to give me. I can feel his hands in my shirt, tugging and pulling and clenching my bare skin... My hands find his belt and I quickly unbuckle it. The moment my hands touch his hard cock Frank lets out a deafening moan, grabbing my face he forcefully shoves my head down. My tongue trailing every inch of his inked flesh along the way. I look up flash a grin at Frank and proceed to pull his ripped up jeans down to his ankles. My mouth meets Frank's dick with such force it causes me to gag a little. He tastes so good, he feels so good I want to devour him, I want him to fuck me until I'm lifeless. Frank starts thrusting his hips, his dick hitting the back of my throat each time. He's fucking my mouth so hard. I don't give a fuck about the dirty floor, the shit stained toilet .. the fact that Frank hasn't said a word to me. I am and always will be his in every way imaginable. Frank lifts me to my feet and studies my face... and finally starts to speak "Fuck, I want to hate you Gerard, but I can't and I fucking hate myse-" I grab Frank's face and stop his words with my mine.. "I know Frank, I know this will always be wrong, but it will always make perfect sense and it's beautiful and tragic all at once. I don't have anything to say other than I want you all of you all the time..." Frank smiles "you sound like the fucking notebook" ... I just laugh and look down my cheeks burning with embarrassment. 

"C'mon G let's go for a walk you shit" I let out a laugh THAT'S IT!? fuck you're such a tease! Frank Just smiles and motions for me to follow him... I grab my coat and I follow him out of the stall...


End file.
